How you would write out Fat Pat now actress Pam St Clement is about to leave EastEnders?
Tough one but see if you can do any better than this....
Here's seven suggestions:
1. She has an affair with Ian Beale and the pair run off together to open a chip shop in Spain.
2. She catches her big ear-rings in one of those old-fashioned wringers for squeezing water out of clothes and dies a horrible death.
3. She teams up with Peggy Mitchell to form an all-girl gang of armed robbers going down in a blaze of glory.
4 She takes over the Queen Vic from the Moons but collapses before she can pull her first pint.
5 She answers an advert for bar staff at the Rovers Return, Weatherfield, and gets it.
6 She is exposed as a former prostitute after her phone is hacked by the News of the World. Oops, too late.
7 She pops out to the launderette and is never seen again.