Dirty makems, you're from Sunderland
Is soap a luxury to Makems?
Before you answer that, before Makems send death threats down in the information superhighway, and before Magpies nod in agreement, let me put that comment in context.
It's one of the gags in a new series of the Radio Four quiz Sorry I Haven't A Clue.
It's in the show recorded - yet to be broadcast - at the Theatre Royal, Newcastle.
There's a potted introduction to the area by one of the panel, Rob Brydon, I think.
In it we learn Newcastle had one of the first department stores. We also learn people came from Sunderland to buy luxuries from that department store. Luxuries like soap.
Now I don't know about you but I find that funny.
It's a nice take on the Sunderland - Newcastle rivalry and is loosely based on real-life events.
Newcastle really does lay claim to the first department store and it doesn't stretch the imagination to assume word reached Sunderland where wives - men don't shop - came to see what the fuss was about.
Bainbridges, now part of John Lewis, was founded in 1838 as a drapers and fashion shop but on record as collecting its takings by department as early as 1849.
Enough history. This is a panel show and a darn good one at that.
Sorry is back for its first series without the late Humphrey Lyttelton and, although it will never be the same, early indications look like it will find its own voice.
Billed as the antidote to panel games it is, oddly, one of the best.
Stephen Fry, Jack Dee and Rob Brydon take it in turns to keep some kind of order, as they share the chair.
Regular panellists Barry Cryer, Graeme Garden and Tim Brooke-Taylor are joined by a special guest each week.
The guest on the show recorded at Newcastle was Phat Phill with two Ls Jupitus. (Phat, by the way, is something to be admired. I didn't call him Fat - although he is!)
Keep tuning into the show with games like Famous First Words, Name Droppers, and Singing Relay.
You won't be disappointed but you will need a sense of humour.
And, finally, yes, I know this blog is supposed to be about TV but sometimes you've got to rest the eyes.