October 2008 Archives

White Van? Green Van? Same Van?

By Ray Lewis on Oct 30, 08 09:00 AM

It would seem the quantity of bad press directed at white van man over the years has been justified, as he has now been officially sent to the naughty step. According to Government statistics, his emissions have trebled since 1970 and now account for around 15% of the phlegm in our lungs and the snot in our noses.

Recycled Bikes for Christmas

By Trash Talk on Oct 28, 08 03:17 PM

Bicycles are an expensive Christmas present that can be outgrown very quickly.
But there are ways to afford a bike and recycle any that you have outgrown.
Let me introduce you to Premier Waste Management's favourite bike recyclers.

If you've chewed over a difficult problem to the point where your head hurts like paper cuts on a boil, eventually you'll say, "sod it" and go to the pub. Unfortunately, John Smith or Mr Carling can't be consulted if you have difficult problems at work.

Unemployment rose at its fastest rate for 17 years last month, and with the economic climate showing no signs of improvement, you'll need to keep one step ahead of your co-workers if you want to avoid redundancy.

Strops, tantrums, tempers. It's the usual day-to-day routine if you've got teenagers.
So why did they make a drama full of stroppy kids? ITV's Britannia High is full of snotty adolescents behaving like snotty adolescents. No thank you, you might say, got that at home.

The series, devised by that Arlene Philips woman from those dancing and talent (!) shows that are popular at the moment, is a celebration of charva-dom featuring kids at a drama school with massive egos getting their own way

Who's Who at Britannia High?

There was something really irritating about Pinky and Perky.
Some cartoon characters as I was growing up were endearing (The Magic Roundabout), some were frightening (Rupert the Bear, believe it or not, but that's a subject for another blog) and some scored 10 out of 10 for annoyance.
Pinky and Perky fell into the last category.

Hello - I've decided to give over this blog to an exclusive interview with Keith Porter, 15th Dan Ninjutsu.
Keith is one of the to Ninjutsu experts in the world and regularly trains with Grandmaster Hatsumi Maasaki in Japan.
Having known and trained with Keith I can safely say he is one of the most knowledgeable martial arts expertrs alive to day.

Phil Doherty: Hello Keith. How and when did you become interested in martial arts?

Keith Porter: "I was born at RAF Cosworth, near Wolverhampton, but spent most of my life in Whitstable, Kent.

"When I was 9-yrs-old I joined a local Judo club in Whitstable, but you know what kids are like, it didn't keep my interest.

"My dad was a former Essex boxing champ so he taught me boxing and I kept that up for a number of years. I then went on to Taekwondo and did that for a couple of years. I also had a little go at Wing Chun, which is excellent for infighting. It was pure luck that I got into Ninjutsu.

I stopped smoking nine months ago and not surprisingly, suppressed my nicotine cravings by adopting the eating habits of Billy Bunter. Consequently, my belly is now in much demand from the template departments at Michelin, Dunlop and Pirelli.

The down side is I have to shower more often, because fat lads sweat a lot, and more especially in our house as my wife feels the cold. The central heating thermostat is never below blast furnace setting - even in the summer. It gets so hot I'm forced to drink an extra three pints of beer every night just to replace what I lose in perspiration.

The problem of S.A.D. (also known as winter blues) arises from the lack of bright light in winter. Warning signs can begin from September or as soon as the clocks go back and dark evenings kick in. Symptoms can include depression, despondency, gloom, overeating, disruption in sleeping patterns and lowered resistance to infection. Statistics show that around 2% of people in Northern Europe suffer bad effects with others (10%) experiencing milder symptoms.

The cure? Intense light every day. Go a brightly lit climate or try light therapy.

Or, on a lighter note, as read in an article by a life coach, try to re-live your last holiday in the sun...

Many people think that our two-percent contribution to global carbon emissions is neither here nor there in relation to China's or America's total.

Why it matters will be the subject of the talk by Ashok Sinha, Director of Stop Climate Chaos on Thursday 23 October in Elvet Riverside Room 140, Old Elvet, (opposite Police Station), Durham from 7.30-9pm.

Did you read that article in the news this week about men being prone to migraines if they had an affair? According to a report from Turin's Molinette Hospital, the strain of juggling a spouse and a lover leads to stress and tension for the cheating partner. This can lead to migraines, which can cause a potentially fatal aneurysm, culminating in said cheating partner keeling over and an ugly "East Enders" style spat between spouse and lover over the open grave.

Now this all sounds like something from the University of Stating the Bleedin' Obvious, but it turns out to be the work of neurologist Lorenzo Pinessi, who presented his less than astonishing findings at an international conference in Turin. The possibility that attending a conference provides the perfect opportunity for a cheating spouse to enjoy a spot of the extra-maritals may not have been entirely lost on Dr. Pinessi.

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